The most important election in New Zealand in over a century has been blatantly hijacked by a notorious British-American faction. The election in question is of course: New Zealand’s Bird of the Year Contest. Bird of the Year is an annual election-based competition run by New Zealand conservation organization: Forest & Bird. The competition runs from October to November, with around 70 species usually contending for dominance. This event is a source of national pride, and wholly positive for raising environmental conscientiousness. Anyone with a valid email address can cast a vote, or even nominate themselves as a “campaign manager” for a bird, organizing social media publicity campaigns.
This year’s champion bird, the Puhteketeke Australasian Crested Grebe, won by a staggering 290,374 votes; absolutely obliterating the North Island Brown Kiwi’s chances of landing a victory (it received 12,904 votes).
The culprit behind this landslide victory is John Oliver; host of the selfishly self-titled variety news show: Last Week Tonight With John Oliver.
Oliver, a “Comedian and Brit,” used his podium on the international entertainment stage, and the immense resources at his disposal, to skyrocket Puhteketeke’s popularity. Oliver placed political propaganda including a “Lord of the Wings” advertisement in New Zealand’s capital, Wellington, as well as billboards in Paris, Tokyo, London and Mumbai, India, and a plane with a banner flying over Ipanema Beach in Brazil.
This only fueled the undying aggressive competitive fire-blood flowing within New Zealanders’ veins, who turned up in record numbers to support the North Island Brown Kiwi.
Unfortunately, Oliver’s influence was so colossal that, according to NBC news, “Vote checkers in New Zealand were so overwhelmed by Oliver’s foreign interference they had to postpone naming the winning bird for two days.”
All jokes aside, this contest is a great way to raise awareness for New Zealand’s special endangered birdies. According to the conservationist organization who runs it, “More than 80% of our native birds are on the threatened species list”. Ultimately, the Bird of the Year election of 2023 has cleverly gotten the masses to pay attention to the slow, inevitable deterioration of New Zealand’s ecological system. By exploiting mankind’s inclination toward conflict, they shed light on the country’s beauty and ecological diversity. Maybe US conservationists can use their innate powers of cultural appropriation for good; copy the Kiwis and save some endangered species!
